The death of a blog that never happened...

Ok, I am back from vacation and all, it was cool and rejuvenating as it should be. I'll probably talk about it in a future post. Thing is before all the lunacy kicks off again in this blog I wanted to get something off my chest. I am in a period in my life with some new beginnings and changes of sorts (hopefully) on the way. This summer has been as much about resting as it has been about planning what comes next. Because of something that happened in February (no earthshattering event I assure you so dont tie your knickers in a knot or anything just yet,lol) my planning for the year went kind of out of the window in a big way. In the months between March and August blogging has been nothing but a terrific diversion from other things. So far so good...


Maybe I should just clone myself and be done with it... who knows:)

Last week as I was thinking about some stuff regarding my future career plans along with some personal stuff, I kinda of started thinking about some habits that may or may not need to change in order to make other more substantial things work. Anyway, some people would call it prioritizing but me being my little silly self would call it "this is what happens when you get too laid back and you start philosophizing for philosophizing's sake" (yep, I am deep like that, scary isnt it... LOL!). Anyway, to cut the long story short, after a couple of sips of my ice cold coffee(the ritual of preparing and drinking what we call "frappe coffee" here in Greece deserves a post of its own, so roll with it for the time being, lol) my ever diminishing brain matter pointed my attention towards blogging. The name of the game being that this particular fun ride takes "too much time" since I am maintaining two blogs, one written in english and one in greek. As it usually happens with these things, a couple of coffee sips later, a domino effect spiralled that made me think if I had to close down one of the two blogs which one would it be and why (I am a sucker for ridiculously stupid dilemmas, it is my nature, lol). What really surprised me is that at a moment's thought I said to myself "the greek blog" which really stroke me as odd to be honest. Heck I am Greek and I like my language very much so why say Greek instead of English. This kinda of unexpected realisation made me get to the juice of this post (at least for me). What does each of the blogs offer me as a blogger, what I like or I dont like about each one of those endeavours. I dont know why I felt the need to share this with you but here are my two cents on the matter:


Let's kickstart with the Greek blog which is more or less "unmarked territory" for you guys (except for itelli who i s Greek as well) because of the language barrier and all.




What I like about the greek blog first...

-Greek language is harder to master(I am focusing on the written aspect of it) and has way more vocabulary than english. I love the "art of using it" way more than the equivalent of english. So expression wise it is more challenging and fulfilling for me at least.
-Greeks hang out in the greek blog, so I am not even partially worried about multicultural differences or offending anyone. That is offending anyone by mistake of course, since I am not much into offending people, unless someone provokes me and persists on it.
-What I like about MY greek blog is that compared to other greek blogs I dont whine about shit all the time. Greeks whine a lot by default, sometimes justly but sometimes because they are afraid to admit they are at fault or afraid to take responsibility for their actions. Thus, they just blame the state for everything like they are not the fools that voted and had it elected, LOL!
-The brand of humour that I use over there is kinda of "diluted" since Greek people are more about laughing with their everyday lives mishaps or some prominent political figure and less about self sarcasm and that little extra black flavour to the humour which I like from time to time. So big challenge there as well, creatively:)
-I like a lot the sense of community in the greek blog among me and my readers as well as among the readers with eachother. Generally greeks are outgoing people compared to other cultures that I have encountered and that reflects in the sense of community among the readers of the greek blog a lot.
-There is more chance of meeting some of them in person because of the distance issue and all. This sort of interaction could breed friendships and relationships which is an intriguing prospect if you think about it.




Now for the ass kicking part, what I DONT LIKE about the Greek blog:

-I dont like the layout THAT much. I mean it is easy going, I like the sunset theme on it and the labels are original but that is about it. It doesnt "rock my world" so to speak from an aesthaetic point of view.
-Greeks in general are not big on pop culture references, comics, movies (unless something becomes a mass phenomenon) or anything of the sort. They consume, digest and spit out but generally speaking they dont "get" the humour of some things that I adore. Thus I prefer not to talk about movies,videogames etc etc. Therefore it sometimes becomes more tiring to write, when you got to come up with original ideas all the time(not that anyone forces me to do it of course ha,ha,ha).
- If I want to ramp up the humour stakes a notch, I cant do it that easily in the greek blog. They either dont "get" the dead pan humour of saying the most ridiculous thing in a serious way -which I love- or they would think that someone that is using such a brand of humour has something wrong with him just because they dont "get the joke" (I dont really give a toss about that by the way, LOL). Truth be told I am pretty happy in that respect with my greek readers, their humour sense is what keeps me going sometimes:)






Now, onwards to "Deadpool's Laughing Den". What I LIKE about it first:

- I love the layout and the appearence of it as a whole. A lot of credit has to go to TCRA for the kickass header he designed for me, I cant thank him enough! But yeah, it just looks way cool in my eyes and I am immensely pleased with it.
- Here I can talk about things more freely, more vividly, more "out there", if you catch my drift. I can use as many pop culture references as I want and statistically speaking, a lot of people will "get" them which just rocks.
- Approaching people from different cultures is something that I always liked and finding the common ground with people of such diverse cultural backgrounds is just something that I really enjoy a lot.
- Since most of you are not familiar with modern Greece talking about it to a pristine audience and finding novel ways of presenting it, is a challenge by itself (more on that in future blog entries).
- The "freeform" nature of the english language and the lightheartidness of approach in this blog makes me write more text in less time which is always cool.
- I just love the wacky sense of humour that permeates this blog. It is just so liberating:)




What I DONT LIKE about "Deadpool's Laughing Den"...

-With some people the cultural barrier and the difference in perspective means that you always need to be a little bit more alert not to insult anyone by going that bit of "extra mile" in the humour stakes or in what they consider politically correct etc.
-Writing in english, regardless how fluent one is, kinda of pisses me off from time to time. Sad but true, LOL! Funny thing is this blog kickstarted as a way for me to keep in touch with the english language above all else before elevating into this behemoth of wackiness that it currently is.

Lastly, although not a dislike thing per se, I am really curious about one thing since I raised the issue. I am really curious how this wacky alter ego I have created for myself, Deadpoolite, is perceived by my readers. I dont know, it never occurred to me before but do people hanging out here identify this "over the top" approach on things as anything more than a way to let some steam off in a funny way ? Who knows... I am having fun so it is all good:) Hmmm... where did that come from I wonder.... I shouldnt have had that last M and M's package last night it seems, LOL!




So there you go, a "blogging weight" off my shoulders, I am home free to spread more lunacy to the masses, a noble goal indeed (yeah right... LOL)!


Take care all of you and dont worry regardless of how rare or often I am blogging, I dont plan to leave the premises for the foreseeable future (I like the damn header and the little poem underneath it too much you see, oh what a sophisticated incentive to keep writing indeed, LOL).


P.S.1: A lot of the views I presented here, especially regarding greek people, do not apply to all people or to my readers in particular (after all since they hang out in my blogs we must have something in common it seems). Just wanted to clarify that since I hate generalizations to be honest with you.

P.S.2: That is one misleading and catchy title I used right there at the top... heh... Oh lady inspiration was kind with me tonight it seems ha,ha,ha (eat your heart out Shakespeare, LOL)

Take care all!

Till next time, DP out!

Let the music do the talking... see you in a couple of weeks!

I wanted to put something in this very spot as a temporary "farewell" to my readers. In all honesty, I will be returning home in a couple of weeks but I dont really know when will be the next time I blog.Returning from my vacation will signal a transition period of sorts for me, so no guarantees for anything really.

Regardless, instead of lengthy text and snappy wisecracks I opted to royally shut my pup for once and let the music do the talking for me. This song I post here was written/performed by Neil Young and I first listened to it when watching the movie "Deadman" by Jim Jarmusch. This is one of my all time favourite movies and one of my all time favourite tunes. I dont know how deep Neil Young dag to write this tune but to me it sounds like his soul is playing the guitar and not his fingers. In periods of self discovery or when I needed to think things over this song always spoke to my soul and helped to cleanse my view on things and dilemmas. Essentially, I am sharing a piece of my soul here, albeit an itchy bitsy tiny one:)





Of course since this being "Deadpool's Laughing Den" and all, I cant leave you on a low so listen to the following song as well for a more uplifting fix:)




Yep, I am one frequently moodswinging Merc but boy am I loving it (this doesnt make sense by the way but I am sure after 30+ posts of "pure uninhibited wackiness" you are used to it by now, LOL!)

Take care all of you and better be here when I get back to full blogging gear in a couple of weeks or whenever really!

C u in the funny pages:)

You got nothing on me cop… a tale of greek traffic madness (Part 2)

(There is no point in reading the following text if you haven't checked out Part 1 first! So be good sports and scroll down or click on the provided link to read Part 1 of this story. Oh, come on, you know you want to ha,ha,ha!!!)


The procedure to reclaim the number plates was quite simple, something unusual for the behemoth of bureaucracy that a greek citizen usually faces when dealing with the national public services. All we had to do was: A) Get the car to the designated KTEO control centre and be done with the malarchy of mechanically checking a car which has nothing wrong with it, B) Get the bloody KTEO certificate to the traffic control centre at Thermopylae (this is the area that you know as “Gates of Fire” where King Leonidas fought the Persian invaders in 480 BC . It is pretty close to where I live, like 15-20 mins or so by car. This place has been, for centuries now, a levelled area compared to the narrow passage among high rocks that it was in ancient times), C) Show it off cockily to some lazy ass cop in an office, pay the bloody fine and reclaim our damn licence plates back , regaining in the process ‘the driver’s dignity’ that was so savagely stripped from our bones.

As the tremendous master tactician that I am, I had formulated an appropriate battle plan...We were few against many but that never stopped the Greeks before... I guess if I took the Spartans' famous words in heart they would go something like these : "Either return back from the battle with your license plates or do not return at all". Who said the spirit of Thermopylae doesnt live on to future generations of Greeks:)

On with the show then… A day after we made the greek traffic regulatory system ‘tremble’ under the weight of our ‘serious offense’ , we went to the KTEO control centre to have our car checked and see if it was a car at its prime or a ‘late’ car mechanically speaking. According to the ‘by the book’ procedure, the personnel had to check a few hundred parameters of the car, e.g. performing some mechanical durability tests to the vehicle, meticulously observing the car seat and recording if it had a crater formed on it from our chunky drivers’ behinds (well not really, but you get the point some of those tests are pointless…). As with all things in Greece, a long story was cut short and the mechanics checked around 10 essential aspects of the car instead of hundreds meaningless ones(I guess having this check up in a private KTEO centre was a wise choice after all, compared to the madness of the public KTEO centres where it is more of a case of "survival of the fittest wallet" if you catch my drift...).

Public KTEO mechanic:
"I can see what the problem is now, pass me that 50 Euros bill... ahem... I mean that wrench and let's proceed to checking the car properly using the process of elimination. Whatever part doesnt fit we throw it away... or you can just write me a bank check instead..."

After the car had passed the tests with flying colours, the mechanics proceeded to give us a pat on the back and to stuff a KTEO certificate up our asses saying that ‘all is good with this car, don’t bother these gentlemen for the next couple of years, not unless you got some death wish or the public vaults are empty and you got to fine someone to compensate for your uncontrollable waste of public money as a government (it didn’t say that but it bloody hell could have, lol). Putting the certificate as a flag of honour on the inside surface of the windshield , we drove to the traffic control centre where some much needed mortal combat was in order.

Despite the small triumph over the technical control hurdle, I couldnt help but have this sinking feeling crawling inside me. More hardship and tears were certain to follow, when dealing with an alien species even DP is afraid of... public servants:)

As soon as we reached this lair of enforced political correctness, we witnessed the usual spectacle of public servants in uniform, constantly scratching their balls in order to make time pass by (or create sparks to make fire who knows...heh) and finish another ‘tiring day at the job’. Amused at this display of fine public service, we found the guy responsible for returning us the license plates of the car. As soon as we provided the appropriate documentation, we made the simple request to him to screw the retrieved license plates back on the car. Apparently, either his hearing ability or his deductive logic left a lot to be desired since he reacted as if we had asked him to diffuse a ticking bomb in a matter of seconds. What? You don’t believe me...? Well, judging from his apathetic reply you bloody hell should! The guy said “Here at the greek traffic service, we don’t screw license plates back on, we just unscrew them!”. Best case scenario was that this clockwise and anticlockwise screwing and unscrewing motion was a great mystery to him and he didn’t want to burn any brain cells trying to figure it out… Worst case scenario is he was just a lazy bum in a uniform (I am sure you know by now which version I am rooting for…LOL).

I was looking for sources of inspiration on how to "make a point" to this loser that was turning a blind eye to my requests. Then I remembered Mortal Kombat and it all became clear to me:) Shortly after the license plates were mine again muhahahaha!

With license plates in hand, we marched outside this place where time had stopped along with the brains of the people working there. Me and my dad went to the car and were ready to make our escape from this lair of public apathy in a blaze of glory… The only problem being that the street signs in the path leading to the major national highway were all either invisible to the human eye or just fucked up. A "U-turn" in the national highway, right in front of the traffic control centre was as death defying as rewatching Jar Jar Binks talking in the first Star Wars movie and living to tell the tale (which is impossible by the way...) . Therefore we opted to make our way using the hieroglyphics written on the few signs we encountered. As we were following this route of no return, the only intelligent life form we encountered was a cop taking a leak in some bushes (Come to think of it I should have asked the bushes for directions… since the guy was busy enjoying one of the simple pleasures in human existence and I didn’t want to ruin this defining moment of his life… ha,ha,ha,ha).

When a man has to go, he has to go! Oh, the simple joys in life, that cop was one happy trooper and I didnt want to ruin his moment... This one is a beautiful video by the way but what it represents in my wacky mind isn't:)

As we continued our quest for the highway road, the asphalt on the street gave place to some really pointy and sharp white rocks (great place to shoot Indiana Jones 4, I am sure, but no place to drive a car, not unless you get some inexplicable kick out of replacing flat tyres…). With every passing moment the car was vibrating even harder from the ever less hospitable surface of the rocky road we were browsing through.As all hope seemed lost, I started imagining pictures of me and my dad on the frontpages of newspapers with the MIA(Missing In Action) tag underneath… Suddenly, amongst the gloominess of this ominous vision of things to come, I saw something flashing at the distance… For a moment I thought it was Optimus Prime in his day job, blame the heat for this insane assumption. Then I realised it was a truck that was carrying various materials in some construction site of sorts. If there ever was a sign of ‘divine intervention’ in this little ordeal, this was it!!!

Could it possibly be true... we had recovered our license plates and escaped from the grasps of traffic warden madness all in one piece! Oh beautiful white light how much I have missed you, oh the fun we shall have together... just lead the way:)

A moment later, one of the workers at the site gave us directions on how to get to the main highway in one piece. As we entered the main road once again, heading home, we started laughing with my dad at the absurdity of it all. We had beaten the system once again and we would enjoy this little victory for the rest of the day… After all, you can never be too sure, in this country, if you will survive your next encounter with any of the tentacles of the public service monster , lol!

I hope you enjoyed this chunk of humourous take on a real life event, as much as I enjoyed writing it….

Till next time…

P.S. I'll be away for the next 10 days, maybe a bit more... Nothing too fancy, not even far from here actually, but truth be told for me it is just perfect:) Staying away from the PC and recharging my 'proverbial batteries' will be just what I need. Take care all!

You got nothing on me cop… a tale of greek traffic madness (Part 1)

As I was daydreaming the other day, I realised that it would be cool, once in a while, to use some sort of real life experience as a more direct starting point for another fun blog entry. It is always amusing to exaggerate on the reality of an actual life event and make it transcend from a miniscule fact in the finite soap opera of one’s life to a whole new level of existence using imagination and self parody as means of expression. Ok, ok, so I got a bit extra philosophical about a simple life moment (giving no doubt a bit of a mini-stroke to a couple of my readers with this sudden excessive display of multisyllabic words and implied intellectuality, heh) but it was a good way to show that I can write down other words except from ‘wacky’ and ‘madness’ (hmmm… what a wacky sentence full of madness… oh crap I just did it again didn’t I… lol).

This is where this story truly starts, fasten your seatbelts to avoid getting any unnecessary traffic tickets (heck a blog has to make some profit so don’t say I didn’t warn you…) and let the madness of my narration officially begin:

A couple of months ago I was driving with my dad, going to a place by the seaside called Rahes in central Greece. To get there faster, from the place of my permanent residence Lamia , we took the highway road instead of some other local route. Half way towards our destination, a traffic warden stopped us to check if our car documentation was ok.

As soon as the traffic cop waved us to stop, some of my money had already flown out of the window from the upcoming fine... I just didnt know it yet:)

As soon as I immobilized the vehicle, I turned to my dad to ask him if the documentation of the car was ok (I am an on/off driver of this car, since I am not around most of the time, thus I had been left in the dark on such technicalities before, what an irresponsible fool I am, lol). The following short piece of dialogue ensued among father and son (DP senior and DP jr so to speak, ha,ha,ha,):

DP: Oh crap, what the hell does this loser want? Of all the cars in the world he had to stop ours… So dad am I missing something on the paperwork front?

Dad: Well everything is pretty much in order except from the KTEO technical control thingy…(Every couple of years or thereabout, vehicles in Greece go through some technical control procedure that takes place in certified service centres. “KTEO” is the abbreviated name of these centres and the process itself).

DP: When were we supposed to do this anyway?

Dad: I think we still got time, it hasn’t been that long since we bought the car…has it?

DP: This is at least a four year old car …. Oh man we are screwed….

Where is KIT when you need him/it? The copper would have just blown a fuse or something if my car was like that:) God I loved this show as a kid, I am grinning just by watching this trailer, LOL!

The cop approached and asked us to get out of the vehicle and present him with our licence and registration (man those clichés are so last century I hate them…lol). Like sheep to the slaughter, we complied to his request while praying to every god imaginable (including Bruce Campbell, LOOL) that the KTEO control thing would pass under his radar. Yeah, right… So, the traffic cop asked for our license and registration (so far so good… ), for the car’s insurance papers (still going strong as law abiding as Wyatt Erp without the moustache and excess gun slinging to boot…) and then the KTEO technical control verification papers (bullseye at last!!! Rocky Balboa would have been proud of such a killer blow… lol). In situations like these, at least in Greece, it is an unwritten rule among public offenders(think ‘the code’ of Pirates in the Jack Sparrow movies and you get the picture…) to try to talk their way out of a situation by pleading not guilty using every conceivable or inconceivable argument in the book. Being the man of action that I am (ha,ha,ha,ha ,sorry , I couldnt resist, this is just ridiculous to even think about… ha,ha,ha) I thought of taking down the cop in a blaze of gunplay but logic prevailed (damn… not again… those social inhibitions of mine need to go ASAP…).

Hmm, always aim for the chest hair... better keep that in mind next time I have some trouble with the law:) Either that or just aim for "the crown family jewels" for a bonafide touchdown (as in US football...)! Too bad I am as law abiding as they come... bummer:)

Therefore, it was up to DP senior to fight the good fight and try to make the cop all sympathetic and puppy eyed towards us. My dad started spitting some incoherent BS about how ‘he was going to do the KTEO thing eventually’ and that ‘this is a relatively new car so he wasn’t aware it needed a certified mechanical check’. I guess those kind of arguments could have worked on a ‘sanity challenged’ individual such as myself (give DP senior an Oscar I say, if Gwyneth Paltrow was awarded one, anyone can get one really, lol). However, the cop was so “impressed” with my dad’s versatility as an actor that he proceeded to award him with the prize of ‘removing the number plates from the car’ and ‘giving a traffic check for the offense’.

Well at least he spared us the full cavity search treatment routine... LOL! I guess that was a small victory of sorts for the DP family under the circumstances ha,ha,ha,ha!

Then, this hybrid of Chuck Norris on crack and Steven Seagal with severe constipation (where did THIS analogy come from is anyone’s guess… ha,ha,ha) started explaining what had to be done to get the plates back. As he was talking, my dad had a vacant look in his eyes like a zombie in a George S. Romero flick, probably thinking to bite the policeman’s head off. Personally, I was thinking to revert to “King Leonidas in 300” theatrical tactics and kick the copper’s ass into a bottomless pit shouting at him “THIS IS SPARTA!!!”. However, my ever invisible biceps would ruin the coolness of the moment, so I hesitated to revert to such extreme measures of photogenic violence(too bad the moment is gone now...if only...oh no point in having second thoughts about it now I guess... lol) . As soon as the "Judge Dredd wannabe" stopped talking, both DPs woke up from this trance of excess envisioning of unfulfilled public violence and went back to the now ‘plateless’ car. My dad was swearing like there is no tomorrow, while I was trying to be the voice of reason of ‘the merry couple of offenders’ and plan our coordinated attack to the greek traffic service with only one thing in mind… We were either going to take our bloody number plates back or we were going to die trying!!! (Don’t you just love those macho ultimatums… ha,ha,ha).

To be continued (and concluded) in Part 2…

Resident Evil the Deadpoolite way, a.k.a. the funny moments of 9 years of survival horror...

Since this blog is more about what makes me have a good time, compared to my greek one, I wanted to write a post about the awesomeness of Resident Evil. As this idea emerged from the depths of that peanut sized white thing in my skull called brain, I realised that by writing about all the core games of the series and what they are about would be cool if this was a Resident Evil fan site but would also make my existing readers all sleepy eyed and bored ( nothing new there then, ha,ha,ha) out of their minds (or what is left of them anyway, since with each of my blog entries a little bit of their grey matter is vaporised irreversibly...a minor side effect I am sure...heh). Anyway, enough with the crap jokes already! The name of the game is to describe some funny moments I had with this videogame or because of it, so let's roll!

So you may ask now... what the hell is "a Resident Evil". To cut the long story short, Resident Evil is a videogame about killing zombies and other biohazardous abominations (yep I am a bioscientist myself, noticed the irony there anyone... ha,ha,ha) trying not to get munched by them in the process. The whole thing is typical b-movie fodder and it has evoked quite a lot of scares for this little Merc called Deadpoolite (why the heck am I talking in third person about myself, am I the reincarnation of Julius Caesar or something...hmmm.... another consideration for my therapy sessions...lol). Story wise most of the core games (there are numerous side games most of them crap...) are about this huge corporation called Umbrella Inc. (how original...) that is working with viruses (how even more original...) to make the ultimate biohazard weapon (how ecstatically original...) when naturally something goes wrong (this is so fricking original that I am going to faint just by typing it...). As a result everyone near the location(s) that the game takes place is transformed into a zombie or is turnt into another type of monster as a result of deliberate experimentation by the company (ok, I am officially fainting... I just can't stand this much originality in a concept... it is surreal...ha,ha,ha). So naturally you are the only malakas (let's just say this is the greek word for "jackass" but it does have many translations in greek... just dont use it too often in Greece, if you ever come around.., unless you have some lifelong ambition to have your skull cracked... hey whatever works for you right? LOL) that is unaffected. It could be because you ate all your vegetables when your mom told you to do so, thus you have become immune to everything by now including biotech hazardous viruses...good boy/girl! The primary objective is to survive armed with cheesy one liners and firearms with severe deficit in bullets. Oh, Chuck Norris would have been proud of me right about now:)




If you watch one vid out of the lot, watch this one! This is the UNCUT introduction of the original Resident Evil game and it is hilarious. It was filmed with real people (I dont say actors, they werent actors, these people were just company employees,lol).The dog you see growling was a fake dog head on a tagpole. This is so cheesy it hurts but it is also very funny because of it. Back then a Resident Evil franchise wasnt even on the radar... this was supposed to be a one off gig you see:)




Ok, now that the premise is done and dusted let's move on to the really funny stuff...(Drums rolling....)



Resident Evil 1 was played by Deadpoolite in 1998 (you know what they say about the first love right...?) at the Halls of Residence in London where he was staying at the time (ok, enough with the third person thing...)


As a fresh faced undergraduate half way through my first year in the university I bought a PS1, rented a TV and bought Resident Evil (what a trilogy of happiness ha,ha,ha...). I knew nothing about it other than that a cousin of me liked it and that it had zombies in it (I really needed no more incentive to buy something back then... besides I could always torture my cousin if it had been crap, so it was a win win situation either way for me... LOL). So, I started playing the game, controlling the moronically speaking and equally stupid acting Chris Redfield. For the first couple of minutes I was just leading the poor clueless sap in the game's scary mansion, marching like a tourist not a care in the world. As I opened a door and entered a dark corridor, I walked a bit further and then a cut-scene kicked in with a horrendous zombie having a feast on some poor bastard. Then, all of a sudden, this epitomy of human decomposition turnt its ugly head to face me (hey, even zombies need dessert...). As I was totally unaware of anything about the game (good times in that respect back then...) I wrestled with the gamepad trying to make the moronic malakas I was controlling react to his impending doom or just plain flee from it.... To no avail though.... I wasn't yet familiar with the control scheme of the game so the zombie just grabbed my sorry Merc ass and just had a ball with this uninvited "human freebie meal". As a relatively pristine zombie killer back then, I just dropped the gamepad, screamed with a voice like the Bee Gees lead singer and was left looking at the screen bewildered (any rumours that I wetted my pants as well is totally unsubstantiated for the most part anyway...LOL).




This bloody cut scene was my first ever in the world of Resident Evil... It lasted only 14 secs and it really creeped me out back then... Remember this was a time before Google and such on-line commodities and info about the game was scarce or I wasnt sure how to access it. So, yeah I got scared...sad but true:)


As I was getting better with the game and was killing zombies left and right my social life kind of deteriotated to the point of non-existent for a week or so. It was me against the zombies and for all I cared there could have been a nuclear explosion in the London area and I wouldnt have bothered to blink about it ha,ha,ha,ha. Point is my laundry was accumulating as well, I hadnt shaved for a week or so (I looked something like a ZZ top singer that week), let's not talk about showering and I really cant recall going to the toilet but it could have happened, I am sure. So, really I was the epitomy of a lazy bum embedded to his bed. One day, within this idyllic scenery and as I was blasting the undead to smithereens, a friend of mine (who later became my girlfriend) knocked on my door and asked : "DP are you alright? I havent seen you for days... anyhow if you are inside there is a phone call for you at the common room phone".

As I cleared my throat to mumble some sort of civilised reply, an incomprehensible growling sound came out of my mouth instead ( I guess my vocal cords went AOL on me since I hadnt talked much for like days....lol). Susan knocked on the door even more persistently, slightly worried... I gathered all my willpower and strength to communicate with another civilised being and lifted my left hand to open the bloody door, ready to blast the imbecile that dared interrupt my Resident Evil transfixation. Good thing the room was so tiny I didnt have to get out of bed to open the door since I am sure my feet were partying in atrophy heaven from my laziness, at the time. As I unhinged the door, my head tilting weirdly to the left like some "Exorcist girl " wannabe, Susan tried to enter the room and the door hit me straight on the forehead (good thing my bucketload of dirty laundry was blocking the door from opening at full length, otherwise I would have been the first ever beheaded student in the history of the University,lol). Unphased by this revolting development (after all, only playing Resident Evil mattered, the rest were just distractions...ha,ha,ha), I had the following dialogue with Susan who was looking at me like I just escaped from a nuthouse:

Susan: Are you ok?
DP:kkkkk......
Susan: You got a phone call.
DP: Whoizit? (all in one word...lol)
Susan: Your parents from Greece.
DP: Okz... berightthere (I was a man of few words what can I say, lol)
Susan: Bye... (looking puzzled)
DP:....

As you can easily deduct, I wasnt offing zombies in-game anymore, I was turning into one of them , LOOLLL!!!

Zombite or Deadpoolite? I wasn't even sure myself back then... itchy tasty...:) Sorry little in-joke there for "the people in the know" (as if...lol), couldn't resist...

Years later I played Resident Evil 3 with a cousin of mine. The original thing about that game was, that it had one kickass monster called Nemesis that could go through doors, so basically you were never safe. At some scripted game intervals the monster cornered you and you were presented with a dual choice of sorts on how to react to the situation.

When we booted up the game for the first time, as soon as we saw Nemesis chasing us we freaked out to the point of switching off the TV and not switching it back on for the next couple of hours! It was surreal, we wouldnt go near the TV or even think of switching on the PS1... As we gathered enough willpower and courage (yep, courage, pathetic isnt it, lol) we continued playing until we were faced with the first dilemma of sorts. The situation was as follows:

Our character Jill Valentine had gone up a staircase to investigate an office for clues/items etc. The office had only one window to the right side and the only real exit was the way we came in originally. As we entered the office, the camera changed view and we saw Nemesis walking slowly up the staircase as well!!! Then the following message appeared on-screen:

"Nemesis is approaching (NO SHIT!!!) and he will reach you soon, what are you going to do?"

2 choices flashed before our terrified eyes...

1. Jump out of the window (situated quite high above the ground mind you, lol)
2.Hide in the office


After surviving the initial shock... a short, albeit panicked, verbal exchange ensued between me and my cousin :


DP: Oh man, HE is coming what the fuck should we do!!!
Thomas: Jump out of the fucking window, no question about it (screaming in horror!!!)

And so our character jumped like a madwoman with a deathwish out of the window (This stunt was performed by a certified videogame character, dont try this at home kids ...heh... not until I get my digicam ready to shoot anyway...lol). Since this was a videogame, she landed on some trash bags underneath.... I am sure if I could smell them they would smell like roses, we were that terrified of Nemesis, ha,ha,ha.



A cool compilation of some cut scenes from "Resident Evil 3 : Nemesis "accompanied by quite fitting music. The "handsome" chap starring in it, apart from the zombies and the babe in the blue tank top, is Nemesis!!! Can't believe I was actually scared to play the game because of this freak ha,ha,ha,ha!



Ok, this post has gotten already too long and I dont want to tire you anymore, but if you'd like to have a sequel to this, just for the laugh of it, just let me know. Plenty of fun stories to tell, I assure you:)


Till, next time DP out!




This last flash is pretty much a classic... It shows some cute cartoony versions of various characters of the series saying basic things about the game. For some reason this vid always makes me crack a smile... it is just cute:)



P.S.1 The Resident Evil movies have nothing to do with the games apart from the use of a couple of names present in the game. These movies are totally crap, stay away!!! You have been warned...

P.S.2 The original Resident Evil videogame was released in 1996 but I played it a couple of years after that... just some useless, stupid trivial info for you:)